Adjusting

Some people will not like the title of this blog post.  Adjusting.  “Oh my God!  How dare you curse at me like that?”  Or I may get the “You want me to do what?”

I’ve been doing a lot of that recently.  I’m starting to take the back seat in arguments.  I’m starting to take the back seat on opinions.  I have not completely withdrawn but somewhere along the way about a few weeks ago, I made a conscious choice to do more “adjusting”.  Why?  It seemed like that was what was needed.  I’m not quite sure if this is the right thing I am doing.  There’s a fine line between supression and adjusting.  Or maybe adjusting is suppressing but not in a forced way but in a pro-active and by-my-choice way.  I choose to adjust instead of it being forced onto me.

A Year and A Decade Come Closing

I hadn’t quite realized that we are getting ready to close another decade!  I was just thinking 2009 is ending!  But, my, another full decade has gone by!  Wasn’t it just 1999 and we were talking about the millenium and Y2K?

This year has been eventful with lots of ups and downs, which seems to be the case with every year of my life.  That’s partly because I move into new cities and the lives of new people more frequently than I would have ever thought I would do.  It’s nice to meet new people but I do wonder what it would be like to know the same people year after year after year?

I thought I would summarize the year with reviewing my resolutions.  I’ll hold off on doing that until the beginning of the year though, when I write new ones.  I’m not a resolution person but since this blog is sort of a diary for my own self, why the heck not?

What I will say is that this evening Teddy is no longer with me!  I’m sad and I miss him already!  You see, Teddy was quite hyper, too hyper to leave off a leash in the house.  Even outside in the backyard, he was quite energetic.  The woman from the shelter where I got Teddy called me a few days ago.  I told her where we stood and she said if Teddy was hyper and aggressive now, then he’s going to be very difficult to manage as he gets older.  She suggested having Teddy be in the shelter with other pets for 2-3 weeks.  But the conversation was so fast and when she came today with two other women, I wasn’t quite expecting or ready for her to say I might want to get another dog.  In fact, she didn’t quite mention that until I asked her!  By this time, Teddy was in the car.  I hadn’t even said a proper bye to him when I thought I may not have him back!  As hyper as he was and as much as that went against my goal of having a dog I could enjoy, it is true that I like the little bundle of energy.  Let’s see how this story unfolds as the new year begins!

Happy New Year to all my <5 readers!  Okay, so there may be more of you!  Best wishes for a wonderful NYE and a terrific 2010!  May it be fun, full of laughter and love, and peaceful!

Delayed Update on Teddy

Another month gone by?!  Where is the time going?  I haven’t even had a chance to think about writing, that’s how much is going on and that’s how fast things are changing around these neck of the woods.

Let me start by putting up some pictures of Teddy and I’ll go from there.

Has It Been A Month? Teddy Is Here!

How time flies!?! I cannot believe it’s been a month since I posted.  There’s lots that’s happened in that timeframe.  Maybe I’ll give an update in the next post.  For now, let me just say that I’m starting my business, things are going well with my cigar friend (after a very difficult couple of weeks leading to lots of adjustments), and it’s almost winter (i.e., Delhi summer is almost over…even though you still need the AC because it still gets very hot).

What I will talk about, though, is Teddy.  I have had Teddy for two weeks now.  He’s our mixed-Indian breed pup.  We got him two weeks ago from a pound, which in this case was someone’s apartment!  He was five or six weeks old then, depending on who you listen to.  We decided he was born in the last week of August, or more specifically, the beginning of the last week of August.  He’s seriously a handful!  It’s like having a human baby running around but you can never forget he’s also an animal.  He teeths like we’re familiar human babies do.  He also has feelings and emotions.  He gets hurt when you discipline him but you know it’s best for him and for you in the long-run.  It’s also the only way possible he’d be able to live with us.  That gives you mixed feelings sometimes but you also know you have to do it.  Like one of the many many articles I’ve read say: for a dog, it’s about exercise, discipline, and affection.  In that order!

I’ll put some pictures up soon!  Till then, hope you’re well!

Finally – My Long Lost NRI Returned Brother

I’ve found my NRI-returned-to-India long-lost brother!  That’s right, folks, it appears that I have hit upon a guy who will keep me sane because he’s going through the same crap I am!  It’s been a while since I came across someone who was humorous, intelligent, had the ability to make a good philosophical point, and, most importantly, someone who’s experiences I could relate to!  Tonight, I found one such soul - neoIndian – also a non-resident Indian (NRI) who returned to India.

Here are a couple of Neo’s posts that are right on the money:

a) Return to India myth #2.  Neo is absolutely right when he says the following:

Perhaps the most unsettling realization for Neo after his return to India has been this: For the rest of his life, he will almost certainly feel different from the local population – no matter where he stays in the world.

It’s the same for yours truly!  Damn!  Double damn!

b) Return to India myth #5. 

But yes, two years after moving to Bangalore, it’s been a “challenge” (don’t you just love euphemistic management jargon?) for the Neos to diversify their friends circle away from other US-returned people.

Neo’s neighbors (many of whom have never lived outside India), would be a great natural addition to his list of friends (and be a great source of convenient next-door play dates for Junior), but there are huge differences.

Granted Neo and his reasons for the differences are not the same as mine, the fact remains that what he says is absolutely right and relevant for my situation too.  I would love to build friendships with my neighbors and my cousins.  I’ve tried!  Unfortunately, I cannot completely (don’t you just love my ability to put a positive spin on things?) relate to the folks I meet here, even someone like my cigar friend.  My family keeps heckling me, much like they heckle Neo apparently, which I have to admit I am having great pleasure in knowing about.  (Alright, alright, keep your panties on – it’s not a sick pleasure.  I feel his pain.  It’s just nice to be reminded that others are going through the same thing every once in a while!)  Worse than my neighbors and cousins is trying to understand the people in the village of North Delhi and to try to get them to understand me.  To think only folks with a certain background will “get me” and accept me for who I am is truly sad.

(As an aside, my c.f. has recently been telling me that I need to be Indian since I’m living in India.  The other day, in quite an angry manner I must add, she said either I behave like Indians or I should leave India.  I was a bit flabbergasted to tell you the truth!  I had never had someone tell me in such serious terms that I should leave the country!  Unfortunately, I cannot do either right now.  This much is true, though, large degree of adoption of Indian behavior will never be possible for me.)

Now, where do I find other US-returned people in New Delhi?  In fact, last few weeks I have thinking of just that – meeting new people.  I thought maybe I can move near the sports complex in South Delhi and use sports as the medium.  Meeting people in The Village (henceforth, my term for North Delhi) is not an option.  I know I will have better luck hanging out with the crowd in a village in Rajasthan.  I might be able to make South Delhi work (okay, it’s sort of like the round peg in the square box thinking I’m following here, but you have to give me kudos for my very positive attempt of faking my reality into reality). 

Bombay is possible.  It’s a thought that again tried its damndest to shift its way from the back of my mind to the front a few days ago.  I didn’t let it hang around very long, I pushed it right back.  I can’t possibly make a move to Bombay at this time.  It has taken me two years and I’m finally familiar with Delhi.  I have a sense of the good and bad parts of town.  I know the places to hang out.  I can’t go back to square one again!  Or can I?  Should I think about this?