Starter Conversations Over Internet Chat

I had a chat with Kanika this morning.  She replied to an email I had sent her on Myers Briggs.  In my simplicity, I thought it would be fun to “get to know” her by going through our MBTI profiles together.  She felt it would be uncomfortable to be analyzed in that manner with someone she didn’t know.  I was caught by surprise in the strength of how she said it.

Actually, and here is the problem, our conversations are through chat.  Having never met anyone or talked to anyone over the phone where you get multiple senses of input, I really do not like chat or email as a way to start conversations.  It is very limited and leads to a high degree of misunderstanding, at least as far as I am concerned.  I had requested Kanika to talk on the phone initially but she preferred chat so we went with that.

I sent her an email this morning after our talk indicating I am unsure how we should proceed.  I told her that I liked her profile, was uncomfortable with our chats, and unsure if it was our medium of communication or if there was a disconnect between us.

I also told her I think she and I can have great intellectual conversations but I was not sure about the emotional side of things.  Physical chemistry cannot be determined until one meets (and it gets stronger over time as you get closer to someone).  Spiritual chemistry takes a lot of getting to know the other person and what it is they want and expect, out of life, out of each other.

My main points were: I am unsure how I feel about her (which is understandable since we have only had two chats online), I do not want to talk via many more chat sessions, and I would prefer to talk to her on the phone (and I would gladly call her and that it was inexpensive).  I asked her to let me know how she wants to proceed.

Maybe I was too quick to speed things up.  Maybe I should be more patient.  Maybe I’m just tired of being alone and therefore my approach isn’t as thought-out as it should be.